Ni Ha-oh, Hello.

I live in China, right?

Guangxiao Temple, GZ

Yup, definitely China. It's just, sometimes it can be hard to tell. Sure, I look out my window and see a city of skyscrapers. I walk down the street and am surrounded by Chinese people. I go to a restaurant, or look at a newspaper, or try to take a bus, and I'm faced with more Chinese characters than my Chinese 205 textbook. My students whisper back and forth in Chinese when they think I'm not paying attention (and sometimes when they know I'm paying attention, but they don't care. But that's another story about my poor classroom management skills). I constantly face that beautiful kind of Chinglish that can brighten your day even while confusing you to no end.

Sounds tasty, yes? It's mushroom soup with a puff pastry crust.

But, I don't speak Chinese. I have been in Guangzhou for 7 weeks, and I have spoken less Chinese than I did in any 7 week period in college. Before arriving here, I was primarily worried that my Chinese would suffer because I speak Mandarin, not the native Cantonese. This has not been much of a problem, as I have yet to meet a local who does not speak Mandarin. My students, in particular, all speak Mandarin to each other. So, then, what's my issue?

The issue is this: unlike when I lived in Beijing, with a Chinese roommate and a language pledge requiring me to do most of my communicating in Chinese, here in Guangzhou, I'm part of an ex-pat community. My coworkers all speak English, and our Chinese abilities range from 'hello/thank you' to full fluency. But, we work in an English school, so we are required to speak English with our students, and our Chinese coworkers are there for the opportunity to practice their English. Those who do speak Chinese at work are generally speaking Cantonese. Actually, I've had more opportunity to speak French at work than Mandarin.

Out and about, I don't really do a lot of speaking, past checking out in a store or ordering food (which is, sadly, usually done by the pointing method, as my ability to read and recognize the names of dishes is pathetic). I have had one casual conversation with a fellow pedestrian, who was happy to have a simple conversation in Mandarin about the relative merits of China versus the US (US: freedom, but poor economy. China: not so free, but at least we've got jobs). I had some complicated business at the bank yesterday, and I muddled along in Chinese for about eight minutes with the teller before she flagged down a passing bank worker who spoke some English to help (to give me some credit, half of her confusion was banking related, not language related).

My Front Door

In fact, I've only had to do one complicated thing on my own which required using all Chinese. I needed to get the lock changed on my new apartment's security door. This presented a fun challenge. How and where do I find a locksmith? And how do you say "change a lock"? If this were Maine, I'd look in the phonebook or online. Here, I noticed that there was a little shop across from the bank that looked like they made/copied keys (ok, the giant key-shaped sign helped a bit). So, I looked up the word for "to change a lock," double-checked it with a native Chinese speaker at work, and stopped by after class one day. I asked the woman if she could change locks. Ahah! She can! Well, I said, I need my lock changed. She asks me if I have a Chinese friend. What? Not really, I say. She's surprised. Do I have anyone who can come translate for me? Is there anyone I can call who can translate over the phone for me?  I'm a bit confused, at this point, that she's so concerned about my inability to understand Chinese, since, you see, we're having this conversation in Chinese. But to appease her, I call my friend/coworker/fellow newbie who is Chinese-American and does speak Chinese. She doesn't answer, and I tell that to the locksmith lady, and I also say I don't think we'll have a problem. Locksmith Lady looks doubtful, but proceeds by asking me what type of door it is. She taps on a piece of metal and asks me if the door is metal. With great effort, I refrain from rolling my eyes, and reply that yes, it is a metal security door. She asks to see the key to the current lock, I pull it out and show it to her, and she picks up a lock from a shelf and asks if my lock looks like this one. It does. Then she asks me if I need the inside lock changed, too. This throws me, a little, as I wasn't really aware you could have a different inside and outside lock on the same door. So, I tell her that I don't think so. This, I think, was my fatal error. She writes up a little card with the name and the price of the outside-type lock, the inside-type lock, and the service fee and hands it to me, telling me I can consult with my husband. Blink, blink, go my puzzled eyes. Why are we suddenly talking about husbands? I don't have a husband, I say. She smiles, and corrects herself, your boyfriend. I don't have a boyfriend, I elaborate, and now it's her turn to look puzzled, as if she cannot imagine a woman without male relatives to look after her -- I'm sorry, did I just step through a time vortex? Either way, she's handing me this card and clearly dismissing me. I'm standing there, looking stupid, saying to myself, shouldn't I be telling you where I live and scheduling an appointment? But no, something's gone wrong (I'm sensing a cultural misunderstanding, not a linguistic one) and I'm too tired and hot to deal with it. So I go.

Tired, Hot, and A Little Sick of Light Pollution

A few days later, I go back, and my flatmate's actually with me this time (mostly because we've been living with one set of keys while we wait to get our lock changed). I take out the card Locksmith Lady gave me the previous time, and this time, I say, hi, remember me? Ok, so this is the one I need, the one for the outside. I don't need this one, for the inside. No wishy-washiness. She says ok, and reminds me of the price. I nod that it's fine. She takes down two locks from the shelf and asks me which kind of key I prefer - my choices are a half-circle shaped one which reminds me of the symbol for Euros, and a solid one which reminds me of a hex screwdriver tip. I don't care either way, but I decisively chose the half-circle. Then she asks if we can wait a moment. And I say ok, and she pulls out some stools for us, and we sit, and I'm beginning to be confused again, and then I realize that we're waiting for her partner, the Locksmith Guy, who goes out to homes while she mans the shop. This is instantaneous service, you see. No appointment necessary; he's actually just going to follow us home and change our lock 1-2-3. We wait maybe ten minutes, he arrives, she writes out a bill and I pay her, and off we go. It's an eight minute walk or so, and I chat badly in Chinese while we walk. He is interested to learn that we teach English but can barely understand/speak Chinese -- he seems confused about how we explain things to the kids. Honestly, I'm with him on that. There are times when you just need an explanation of a word or a grammar point in your own language. We arrive at the apartment, we go in, he starts working on the lock. Twenty minutes later, it's all done, he shows me how the new lock works, and we're all set. He says "bye-bye" (literally. I do not think I've heard a Chinese person say the Chinese word for 'goodbye' yet) and that's finished. Despite some cultural and language problems, I was able to get what I needed done, done.  The challenge made it stressful, but it also made it a little bit fun. I miss having more of these opportunities to try my skills. Switching to English feels like cheating.

speaking of the view from my window...

So, to make a long story short, I have a new personal goal: speak more Chinese. Even if it means being that crazy person who breaks elevator-etiquette and talks to strangers in the lift. Even if I have to pretend to not speak English. Even if it means accidentally ordering hot papaya soup (not papaya juice) and dumpling soup, not boiled dumplings. And maybe I'll buy a newspaper for some reading practice. Hmmm. If only my Chinese professors could see me now.